 Coke bottles and diapers....oh my!! Ahhhh, how they jump off the bandwagon so quickly. What do you really say after a losing weekend? Well, you step back, take a second and start thinking logically. First and foremost even the best handicappers in the world are roughly 55% to 60% correct, "Professional sports bettors, by comparison, rarely sustain a long term winning percentage higher than 57 or 58 percent, and it's often as low as 54 or 55 percent. People find that hard to believe, and they understandably get even more skeptical when told that, for a genuine professional-level sports bettor, a long term winning expectation of 60% or more is actually too high." (Ed. Note: The source of this quote is unknown however we believe it was either something Sam Rothstein Jr. muttered in a gin induced stupor or it was in "High Times!" Which 50% of the time, is 100% accruate, all of the time!) In the first two weeks of keeping track, it is in my opinion that a 10-10 record and 3-1 in locks is pretty good. And if you are solid in your betting pattern, which means putting more money on the locks, then you should be doing just fine, "The measure of success of a sports handicapper is not his percentage of winning bets, but the relative amount of profit he made over any given period of time." (Ed. Note: This quote is literally on one of those motivational posters on Don Trotters ceiling in his bedroom. I shit you not) If I can look back on a bet and feel good about it, its not all that bad. (Ed note: Huh??) For instance, let's look at the Steelers game. Although we all know their fans are bald, fat and have lots of back hair, they still should have beaten the Browns by more than 14 right? One would think. But two fumbles on back-to-back drives inside their own 20 yard line, while up 13 in the fourth quarter and only needing FG's to cover, makes me proud of that bet. If it weren't for the incompetence of "Fast" eeerrrr "Fumble" Willie Parker and Reshard Mendenhall, that game covers easily. Furthermore, in the Bills game, Trent Edwards had been playing really bad football, but I guess my crystal ball didn't see some turd named "Fitzpatrick" come into the game and play like Joe Montana. Lastly, I can still look back on that Texas game and be proud I made the right choice. Three turnovers in the red zone while leading 16-13, again only needing a FG to cover, suggest I made the correct play. With that said, I'm not here to make excuses. As a gambler you can't. If you don't like fumbles, turnovers, injuries and phantom penalties that cost you a cover on your bet, then don't bet. It's all part of the action. As aforementioned, all you do is take a step back, take a deep breath and move forward toward the next weeks games. What you don't do is jump off the bandwagon, start calling people "horrible" and then use a child as a tactical comeback (that's just grotesque). (Ed note: That's a shot at you Chazz in case you are drunk, which there is 99% chance that at 6:14pm on a Friday you are!) So as of now, I stand an overall 10 & 9 with a push, or 10-10 if you see it that way, and 3-1 in my locks. Without further delay here is the action. See if you can draw a correlation (Ed note: This is head to head with Chazz's baby! Though I'd tee it up!) Notre Dame -8 UCONN +7.5 Under USC/Oregon St. Indiana +5.5 Virginia +5.5 LOCK Michigan beats diaper wearing, Coke bottle glasses, can't form complete sentences in a press conference, shit pants, looks like Gargamel from the Smurfs, pee-pee breaks in the middle of games, I stole Where's Waldo's pants, blind, clueless, slobbering, 98 year old JOE Paterno AND his HEAVILY overrated, quarterback looks like a linebacker who can't throw and wears wristbands around his triceps like the Ultimate Warrior, no offense, terrible secondary, we always lose at Michigan, Penn State Football Team. CommentsSam Rothstein Jr. Fri, 23 Oct 2009 16:02:55 Even as a Don supporter, I can not fully support your lock as I believe anything based on the assumption that Joe Pa is actually coaching anything is false. that team is coached by about 18 assistant coaches making calls from sky boxes while Joe Pa paces along the sidelines because it's the only way to keep his heart from stopping. With the exception of that game, I will be placing a 5 team teaser on the rest in support of Don Trotters triumphant return. Chazz Speedman Fri, 23 Oct 2009 20:25:56 Don in the words of the greatest musical artist of our time, Afro Man...colt 45 and 2 zig zags, baby that's all we need. Instead of gambling on sports with your solid 10-10 record why not just put 500 on red and 500 on black at the roulette table...and hope it doesn't come up green, turd. Chazz Speedman Sat, 24 Oct 2009 20:53:09 If you hate money don't pick my games bitch...3-2 with a lock on PSU to win. So really 4-2 with one lock. PSU just fucked Michigan and USC/OSU over 50.5!!!! Sam Rothstein Jr Wed, 28 Oct 2009 16:03:58 We could have quite a Chazz/Don rivalry going here... i like it Ademola Okulaja Fri, 30 Oct 2009 06:57:49 Mr. Hogan, Fri, 30 Oct 2009 19:59:29 Please utilize the contact us feature and address your questions to Chazz and I'll be sure to type them on professional letter head and send them in the snail mail. Regards. Leave a Reply | Tom Hammer
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